Peaches and Cream

Ever since the weather has warmed up a tad there has been this teenage boy who has been riding his moped-small engine motorcycle up and down my road OVER and OVER again all day and night. The sound of its small puttering motor has increasingly annoyed me and every time I hear him cruising, it reminds me of the Stanley Kubrick film "Full Metal Jacket". I picture and equate this annoying sound to the Vietnamese Hooker riding on back of a scooter as her pimp rides her around looking for johns. (What do we get for 10 dollars?)

So................. I was sitting on the side porch letting the 14 year old Siamese cat graze some grass and get fresh air the other day, here comes "scooter fag" riding down the street. I proceed to walk out into the middle of the road and act like an old school traffic cop putting up my right hand out ordering the kid to stop his scooter. He obliges and I approach him and say, "Hey. Whats up?"

He replies, "Dude not much."

I then ask, "Why do you repeatedly ride up and down this same road at least 100 times a day?"

He then (in a classic burnt out 15 year old voice) exclaims, "WHY DON'T YOU MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS?!"

I smiled the biggest smile upon hearing this dew rag wearing kid say this to me and answered "Good answer, very good answer." I then picked up the arthritic feline and went back inside.

I just wished more people in this world had the irreverent attitiude that "scooter fag" has. He is more than welcomed to ride anywhere he pleases at all hours of the day.

Brothers

I have five brothers. Four older than I and one younger. Each of them is cool in his own way. I noticed that I haven't updated my blog in a while so I decided to post about how cool they are..


My oldest brother, Jason, was born on December 28, 1978. I don't know him very well, and I haven't seen him in about five or six years. My family has no idea where he is these days. We worry about him from time to time. I don't really remember a lot about him, but I do remember he is one of the best cooks ever! He makes awesome pizza. Jason is pretty quiet, he usually kept to himself. He also played guitar pretty well. He likes heavy metal like myself. It sucks that I never see him anymore. I hope he is faring well..

My second-oldest brother, Charlie, was born on December 11, 1982. He's really nice. Probably the nicest brother I have. He's also pretty quiet. He kicks ass with his guitar playing skills. And he's a really good visual artist as well. A lot of people say that I'm a good artist, but I am that which pales in comparison to my brother Charlie. I look up to him when it comes to things of artistic nature, and I'm sure I will continue to look up to him in the future when it comes to things of psychedelic matters.
I always loved to watch Charlie play The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past. It's my favorite game. I like playing it myself, but I miss watching Charlie play. He was so great at it. I would also enjoy watching him play the first two Zelda games on the NES. Man, he was good..
Charlie is married. He got married about two years ago. His wife is really nice. She and I are always joking together. We were pretty good friends before she and my brother got married. She always calls me "Sis". Her name is Frances, but everyone calls her Ana. She is ten, yes ten, years older than Charlie. It's kind of odd, but they are really great together.

My third-oldest brother's name is Aaron. Actually, his first name is Noah, but he goes by his middle name because my mom didn't want kids at school to tease him about having an ark or whatever. If that was the case, then it makes me wonder why she named him Noah in the first place.. Anyway, Aaron was born on September 12, 1984. He, like Jason and Charlie, is a badass when it comes to playing a guitar. And, like Jason and myself, is a fan of metal. Aaron is the brother with whom I share the closest sibling relationship. We were always doing things together. Always getting into trouble together. It was never just me. It was always the two of us (or just him). We would sneak out after it got late and go to our friends' houses or something. Those were such good times. I remember one time, Aaron ran away because he and my mom got in a big argument.
Aaron is married as well. He got married last St. Patrick's Day (2003). His wife's name is Megan. I'll hold my tongue on this one.

Patrick, my brother who is one year and sixteen days older than I, was born on March 12, 1987. He graduated last Friday. Patrick used to go by "Kelly", his middle name. Why? Not sure. My mom started that one too. But Patrick doesn't like being called Kelly anymore.. Which is totally understandable.
Patrick and I really just recently starting getting along. We used to fight all the time. We couldn't both occupy the same room together for a mere ten minutes without some sort of shit hitting the fan. It was insane. Only once have I ever gotten a bloody nose, and it was Patrick who gave it to me. Our fights were fierce. Everyone just had to wait until we stopped ourselves. Oh man, we hated each other back then.. but these days, Patrick and I are pretty close. We practically share all our friends. (We live in a small town anyway; 0.4 square miles. Population of about 150-200. Pretty small, indeed..)

My little brother, Zach, was born on July 17, 1995. Zach is annoying, as are most younger siblings. He needs some Ritalin, else his hyperkinetic disorders shall drive me to the breaches of insanity.
Zachary and I don't really have that much of a relationship.. Unless you consider a dictatorship to be a type of relationship. Seriously though, the kid is spoiled. I'll be the first to admit that I can be pretty hard on him sometimes. Unrelenting sometimes too, probably. He kind of fears me, and that makes me feel sad. But hey, he needs discipline, and if his mother is too unwilling to instill it, then I guess I will. Besides, I'm pretty sure he knows I love him. I've told him that I'm glad he is my brother and that he means a lot to me.. I'm not just here to punish him. When I cook, I always ask him if he wants anything. I buy him candy every now and then. And when his class needed things for bake sales, I would sometimes bake some cookies. See? I'm not all that bad.


Growing up with my brothers was fun, to say the very least. It makes me happy that I'm not an only child, as I would be rather lonely, I would think. My brothers.. They all mean so much to me.