Peaches and Cream

Ever since the weather has warmed up a tad there has been this teenage boy who has been riding his moped-small engine motorcycle up and down my road OVER and OVER again all day and night. The sound of its small puttering motor has increasingly annoyed me and every time I hear him cruising, it reminds me of the Stanley Kubrick film "Full Metal Jacket". I picture and equate this annoying sound to the Vietnamese Hooker riding on back of a scooter as her pimp rides her around looking for johns. (What do we get for 10 dollars?)

So................. I was sitting on the side porch letting the 14 year old Siamese cat graze some grass and get fresh air the other day, here comes "scooter fag" riding down the street. I proceed to walk out into the middle of the road and act like an old school traffic cop putting up my right hand out ordering the kid to stop his scooter. He obliges and I approach him and say, "Hey. Whats up?"

He replies, "Dude not much."

I then ask, "Why do you repeatedly ride up and down this same road at least 100 times a day?"

He then (in a classic burnt out 15 year old voice) exclaims, "WHY DON'T YOU MIND YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS?!"

I smiled the biggest smile upon hearing this dew rag wearing kid say this to me and answered "Good answer, very good answer." I then picked up the arthritic feline and went back inside.

I just wished more people in this world had the irreverent attitiude that "scooter fag" has. He is more than welcomed to ride anywhere he pleases at all hours of the day.